Infertility

Guest Blog – Seanna

Dear future baby,

Hi! I’m your mummy, I’ve waited so long to meet you and so has your daddy. We have spent such a long time wondering what you’ll be like. Will you be artistic like me, sculpting and sketching or will you be like your daddy? Video games and music and a mad photographic memory? Or a nice mix of the both?  I hope you grow lovely curls like your daddy with your daddy’s beautiful blue eyes and have lots of lovely freckles on your nose like mummy used to have when it was sunny.

What way can I describe your daddy to you? He’s so wonderful and so fun. He makes me so happy and I have wanted to make him a daddy for so, so long. He has been so excited to have a mini him if you’re a boy or a little princess if you’re a girl. He longs for a child and I felt so guilty for so long for not being able to do this for him. All you will ever need to know is that your daddy will love you forever and protect you from everything. He’s also a really good spider catcher. He makes the world’s best pasta bakes and will tell you endless stories of when he was little that will make you smile. Unfortunately daddy tells lots of bad ‘dad’ jokes so he can make you groan with them, he’s been practicing telling those for years and years .

Your daddy is so kind and will no doubt spoil you rotten, as he does me. He’ll teach you to play PS4 and will have the patience (that mummy doesn’t) to do jigsaws on the tabletop. He’ll teach you to play guitar and will be your best friend. Your daddy is awesome.

As for me, well I’m a little eccentric, very artsy and have been dreaming of being your mummy for as long as I can remember. I have dozens of Pinterest pages for your nursery, I’d paint you a Disney castle with all the characters, a cosy chair where we can have a cuddle and read ‘The Gruffalo’ or listen to some music. I’d make you anything you’d like and we’d have our own little creative space for paintings and clay. We can make daddy lots of yummy cookies and cakes and we can go every Saturday to watch daddy do park run. Then spend days in Portrush having ice creams on the beach and wading in the sea.

I can’t wait for all the little special occasions, Easter; to hunt down eggs in the garden. Your first holiday to Disney world where I’ll take way to many photos and our faces will be sore from laughing and smiling so much. Getting a photo with Mickey Mouse and Elsa from frozen. Your first Christmas where your grandparents will buy you too many toys and everyone will be posing for photos with you.  Taking you to buy your first pair of shoes, taking you for the first day of school seeing you run to your new friends and playing and laughing.

The sad times too where you’ll need so many hugs and cuddles. The first time you fall and cut your knee. If you fall out with your best friend at school and need reassurance I will be there for you as will your daddy who’ll always make everything okay again. We will make sure that you always feel safe and secure and that if you have a bad dream then we will be there to check for any monsters under your bed. Making forts out of bed sheets and reading books with torches sneaking cookies from the kitchen and glasses of milk so that you have that little milk moustache just on your top lip.

In January 2018 we lost who would have been your big brother or sister and we will never forget them. You are the end result of the longest, most tiring journey that we have ever been on but we would go through it all again in a heartbeat. Mummy has made so many new friends and so you will have lots of new friends ready made too because mummy knows that all the beautiful women she has met will have their babies and will succeed. It’s a long and very emotional process but in the end the miracles that we are blessed to have will make it all okay.

We have been through so much to get you. You can 100% know that you were prayed for and wanted so much. Hundreds of scans and needles and blood tests and tears of joy and tears of sadness. We have lost so much and gained so much more. I swear you will never be taken for granted and will always have the best in life. You are my rainbow baby that will always be wanted and loved.

All our love, your future mummy and daddy xxx

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s